Hardcore Alter Boi

First things first - there are no pictures or video here, so if your search for hardcore alter boi pr0n brought you here, you are in the wrong place... but thanks for the hits, pervert.

I played handball yesterday with Brittany, the Ministry's resident Alter Boi and trusted Left Hand of His Sinfulness. Despite her spastic flailing, I think we have found her athletic niche.

She graduated from the soft "big blue" ball to white label hardball after just one game. No whining, no complaining - she handled the stingy hands and bruises better than any of the guys did the first time we played hardball. She is a good partner too - she and I beat Smith and Flynn in doubles! She also made some clutch shots - one that stuck in my mind was a great return of one of my super sneaky, weird spinning serves. And she hit it with her LEFT hand!

I'm throwing down a challenge right now - I think my acolyte can beat any woman in the Flock in a best of three match in singles handball. Any takers?

12 comments:

Big Gay Jim said...

Chick fight! Er...not really, but kinda! We could sell tickets and make a fortune! (I hear good things, and am proud, Squiddy!)

Modig_Bjorn said...

I've been told I have pretty hands. Does that qualify me to play the Squid?

His Sinfulness said...

Unless those hands came in a set with a vagina, the answer is "No."

But you are a big girl in many ways...


;)

Raksha said...

Wow, go Squid! You're a rock star!

Flynn said...

Unfortunately I showed up late - I wish I had been able to play the full set, it was a lot of fun.

And Linus' account is correct, she did in fact confront the hardball menace with more gallantry than any of us who went before her.

It was an excellent game (and no one tried to rip my nipple off!).

Good times were had by all.

Mayren said...

*hugs flynn*
it's bad that you fear handball due to nipple rippage.
I understand why you were late now.

His Sinfulness said...

To be more accurate, no one tried to rip Flynn's nipple off. I did, COMPLETELY ACCIDENTALLY, push him out of the way one day during a doubles match... using his freshly pierced tit as a handle.

As we have discussed before, handball and racquetball are not without their risks - that's part of what makes them FUN!

In the grand scheme of things, my boob mangling is far from the worst Flynn has had. He has recovered nicely from being hit in the eye (sans goggles), ribs (which generated a near perfect imitation of the Howard Dean yowl) and in the throat (HI-lariously self-inflicted). I have also heard that he took a high velocity racquetball hit directly in the pierced nipple just recently. Perhaps Flynn will favor us with a recounting of his favorite wallball injury - just to keep his recent nipple woes in perspective.

Squid said...

Seriously...nobody is willing to take up the challenge. I mean honestly I am not *that* scary...for crying out loud, I randomly flail into walls when not playing handball. I am though, very excited that I have found a sport I am pretty decent at!

Mark Travis said...

way to go brit.... woot! for you, woot!

becca said...

If I lived in Laramie. . . I've never played handball (or racketball) but I think that I might not be that horrible (although I am kinda terrified by small balls flying towards my face). The next time that Brit and I are in the same state, I accept the challenge!

Squid said...

Yay Becca! I accept the challenge, that the next time we are in the same state, handball shall be played! :-D

His Sinfulness said...

becca,

You are welcome to come see us at some point - we would even put you up at the palatial estate of His Sinfulness...

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