A few basic rules for life...

1) Don’t kill stuff unless it’s going to kill you if you don’t.
I don’t mean like, “we had to attack Iraq ‘cuz they might have weapons of mass destruction, and a whole lotta' oil...” I mean more like, “look out Bob, that bear is coming fast and he wants your burrito supreme...”

2) Don't adhere blindly to religions that tell you to lop off body parts, or sacrifice your children.
Genesis 17:10-14, and Genesis 22:1-3. 'Nuff said.

3) Don’t fry wontons in the nude.
No examples here - just take my word for it; I have a scar. It's hard to explain the first time you're naked with a new lover.

4) Trust the judgement of your animal companions.
My dog Tobi only ever bit two people - my ex-wife, and her father. She was right, on both counts.

5) Do not attempt to ski/skate on snow-covered grass while wearing a kilt.
I left "ass angels" (something akin to snow angels, but much colder) on the hill in front of Hoyt Hall today...

6) Don't seek your spiritual path on the internet.
They let anybody post here.

Here endeth the lesson. Go in Peace.


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