Critically Caucasian

We are so white as to actually be dangerous to ourselves...

Alter Boi: I am moving to Scotland and becoming a sheep herder.
HSBP: All right... any reason?
Alter Boi: I have always liked the sheep people. They are good people. And they need someone to look after them.
HSBP: Why Scottland? There are sheep here. Why you gotta' hate on your sheep homiez?
Alter Boi: 'Cuz the sheep homiez here are gangsta 'n shit. The sheep in Scottland are much more in-tune and mellow.
HSBP: That's just another plot from the Man, trying to keep a woolly brother down, girl.

Alter Boi: Nah, man that's just static in the air about that kinda shit. It's all conspiracy pyscho babble, yo.
HSBP: If you ain't down with the sheep homiez, then you ain't down, wigga.
Alter Boi: Foo' I don't be hatin' on the sheep homiez, yo, I ain't sayin' I'm not down but damn, they all strung out on street corners 'n shit, snatch purses and holdin' people at knife point just to get some alfalfa, yo. That shit ain’t right.
HSBP: But we gots to help our woolly brothers to help theyselves, G.
Alter Boi: I suppose so Homez, but I'm not down with hand outs… I'm all about the hand ups. We should start a reach-out program for the ewe's out on the corners, that's where the real problems are. Especially in this state, I mean when the motto is "Wyoming: Where men are men, and sheep are scared." It just ain't right, we gotta put a stop to this.
HSBP: Word, dawg.
Alter Boi: Word.

2 comments:

Mark Travis said...

Wow... I got nothing.

That was slightly painful and amusing all at the same time.

Modig_Bjorn said...

This gives "The Black Pope" a new meaning.

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