Prepare To Be Amazed

Those who know me personally are well aware that I am exceedingly picky about my movie watching. The list of films I have walked out of with no complaints is tiny. Off-hand, I can only think of three in recent years; The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Even with them, I was irritated that they left out Tom Bombadil.

If you plan on making a movie based on a book I have read or a historical event I know about, you have to get it right. If you bastardize, molest, fold, spindle, or mutilate the original, you will earn my ire. Gods help you if you ignore the original (don't think I have forgotten you Alex Proyas and Jeff Vintar - I, Robot was fucking unforgivable!). The list of films that failed me in this way is long, and I can still spit venom about features from years ago that raised my hackles; don't even get me started on Arthur, or the first X-Men movie, or the Hulk, or Judge Dredd...

I also have a huge, throbbing hate-on for summer blockbusters. If it is over-hyped for a summer release, it begins with two strikes against it.

All of the foregoing makes what I am about to say all the more shocking:

GO SEE THE TRANSFORMERS MOVIE!

For once, Vanilla Fresh is right about a movie. It rocks - period. Go see it. Go now.

47 comments:

Flynn said...

Well this is a first... I thought you had your cinematographic appreciation amputated.

But you're right, Transformers kicked ass. I hardly know anyway about Transformers and even I was totally blow away...

Modig_Bjorn said...

It's good to know that my taste in movies has been vindicated in your eyes. ;)

What did you think about the two female leads, eh?

Glad to hear you enjoyed it! The wait for the DVD release is not going to be an easy one. I found myself nervously scratching and shaking this weekend because I hadn't seen the movie for over 48 hours. I need my sweet Transformers fix. *Taps arms to find a good vein*

Mayren said...

#1 - *hifive* i and my friends were also pissed off that Tom Bombadil was cut from the movies.
well that and at the end when the Hobbits had to fight and take the Shire back for their own.

#2. are you you guys totally sure that Transformers is not a total "wait for DVD only"?
I loved the old school cartoon and i'm not sure about the new fangled stuff that doesn't include
"Ba-weep-grana-weep-ninny-baum"

His Sinfulness said...

modig,
The young ladies were both amazing and the Aussie had an awesome accent, but I honestly would have loved the movie without them... THAT's how awesome it was.

Mayren,
It is one of those films that is greatly enhanced by the big screen. It will be cool on your tv too, but Optimus Prime should be like 40 feet tall the first time you see him...
:)

Big Gay Jim said...

Yeah, it's on my "I should go see that" list. I just hate going to movies alone. Now, had SOMEone called to mention there was a movie expedition afoot....

His Sinfulness said...

Sorry - it was all very last minute, Jim...

Mandy said...

Giant. Alien. Robots. Rock.

Big Gay Jim said...

*grin* I just wanted to prove Nerdy's not the only one who's perfected 40 year old Jewish mother guilt. I can always hold dinner off for a while. You know...because I would want food in my mouth if you should call... ;)

Raksha said...

First of all, call me a heretic, but I frelling hate Tom Bombadil and I was thrilled that he got left out. He creeped the hell out of me.

Second, my Inner Child is so happy to hear that the Transformers movie doesn't suck. Optimus Prime was one of her first crushes. Yes, I'm serious.

MightyMightyMax said...

Ditto Jim's first comment.

Claytonian said...

If it doesn't have a giant robot named Omnicron voiced by the late Orson Wells, I'm not really interested.

Mayren said...

OKOK - My hubby and I went to the movie last nite.
I give it a B+
Too much action - not enough character depth to make the storyline interesting. This feels like it would have made a hella great mini-series. I feel like I was in the theatre WAY to long for so little substance. I did enjoy all the hidden references to the original but man no HINT of the old song at all in the music ticked me off too. I liked Shia.
---
Yes i understand that there is a 3 movie deal out there. So far we are waiting to see if #2 is going to be greenlit. looks positive so far from Studio-land where i live.
---
*spoiler*

Other hand - The hubby actually held my hand tight when Bumblebee had his moment near the end in the middle of the fight right before the tow truck thing. (trying to be vauge for those who haven't seen)

My husband thought the movie was A++ (guys and their robots)

Mayren said...

secondly - Omnicron is coming in later movies but the voice talent has not been cast yet.

Flynn said...

Okay sweety I have to disagree now. I liked the thin plot. I know, not something you normally say, but I was really concerned they were going to turn it into some humanist drama like so many movies that have come out lately. But they went with what they had and introduced the characters enough to let you get to know them, but let the movie be about the giant robots. They didn't try to make it something it wasn't...

His Sinfulness said...

Flynn handled that so diplomatically - I'm too much of a zealot about this movie to be that tactful. Some of the girls in my office were saying they didn't like it and all I could do was froth and point at them while yelling, "Blasphemer!"

Mayren said...

but what about the character depth to the actual giant robots?

I went in with an open mind - i came out knowing that it was a guy's flick. I still think it's good for what it was - just not quite making the "A" grade.
I have been hearing the ranting from my hubby too. He feels the same as you guys... all comments even REMOTELY subjective, objective, or not in line with the Zealotry are obviously from a complete heretic.

Good thing I'm not as closed minded when it comes to people who don't like Harry Potter.
*smooches*

His Sinfulness said...

I *want* to like Harry Potter... Many of my friends tell me it is the best thing since sliced bread.
I tried. I honestly tried to read the first book. I just can't seem to care about it.

I'm happy for you all, though - I hope the new movie is killer!

You will probably see me getting all fidgety like you guys when the first movie of the "His Dark Materials" trilogy gets closer. "The Golden Compass" is set to premiere December 7th!

Flynn said...

The Golden Compass is going to rock your fucking socks!

Ahem... anyway...

I am so not a Transformers zealot. When the podcast airs you will all know that too well... But think about it, can you even name one of the humans in the Transformers show. I don't even remember what they looked like. It's about the robots, the people are only there to have nice boobs and flee in terror...

As for Harry Potter, like His Sinfulness I just can't get into the books. The movies on the other hand are brilliant... Emma Watson (Hermione) is super hot. I know, I know, a little young still, but we can hope for a super hot sex scene by the last movie right?

His Sinfulness said...

Damn dude - no one wants to see Hermione and Ron getting freaky.

(Now, Hermione and Ginny Weasley together would be cool...)

Flynn said...

I don't recall saying anything about Ron...

Modig_Bjorn said...

JEBUS PEOPLE IT'S "UNICRON" NOT OMNICRON!

Oh, and Harry Potter is teh gay.

Modig_Bjorn said...

Plus, the movie is about giant alien robots and you want depth? Again, JEBUS!

Modig_Bjorn said...

Oh, and for the record, the movie turned my fiance into a Transormers geek. So the "it's a guy movie" is total BS.

His Sinfulness said...

I wondered about that - "Omnicron" is the name of one of the races in the game Heroscape.

(Be nice, Modig. Don't make me use the spank ray...)

Nerdygirl said...

..I've seen Harry Potter's wang.

That is all.

His Sinfulness said...

Link?

Nerdygirl said...

It was in a friend's comments which expired (dumb haloscan...). I actually think the website was taken down due to traffic restraints.

I do know this though: he's uncut and a grower.

His Sinfulness said...

Is this what we've come to? Discussions of Harry potter's junk?!

I might as well just give in and post all that Harry and Snape slash fanfic I have lying around...

Flynn said...

I have a female friend that say Harry on stage in the UK. He had a full frontal scene, I guess he's hung like a horse...

Flynn said...

Shortly following my post, this happened... yeah, this is the kind of crap we talk about:


Reverend
jebus, man - we are now talking about Harry potters wang...

Flynn
yeah, seems he did a play on stage with full frontal, guess he's hung like a fucking horse

Reverend
well, Nerdy says he's a grower not a shower... conflicting reports... interesting.
I think that as soon as the 7th movie is out, he will be too...
(see what i did there?)

Flynn
indeed
wait... how would she know he's a grower...

Reverend
she has seen it
in a pic

Flynn
okay...
so where do you get a pick of Harry Potters shit limp and ... umm... happy... to you know... compair..\

Reverend
lol - ask her


Well Nerdy... how about it?

Nerdygirl said...

Lemme call some people who know people who fucked a guy in prison. They'll know where the pics are.

As for knowing he's a grower, well I'm assuming due to his...stubbyness in the pic I saw he'd either have to grow or it's just...small.

His Sinfulness said...

That's right folks - thanks to giant robots and Harry Potter's dick we have broken 30 comments.

I think this says something about us as a group...

Modig_Bjorn said...

Optimus Prime would be ashamed of all of you.

Flynn said...

If Optimus Prime wasn't as anatomically correct as a Ken doll, he would probably be hung like Harry Potter...

Yeah... I took it there, now what?

Mandy said...

Ok...so Harry Potter's wang...do searches for Daniel Radcliff and Eqqus. I think that's the spelling of the play he was in.

I find it funny that everyone's all a flutter over his boy bits but not one mention was made of his character having a love scene with a horse (that's the reason why he's naked in the play).

The play, but not with Daniel, was performed at UW years ago. It was put on in response to the proposed nudity ordinances. Anyone remember those?

Big Gay Jim said...

The play is Equus. Not only is young Harry nekkid (for those of you unfamiliar with this spelling, you should IMMEDIATELY google "Lewis Grizzard), he gets it on with a horse. For the voyeurs out there, visit http://harrypotternude.blogspot.com. There are several less revealing pics out there too, and young Harry is looking GOOD. I hadn't actually seen his hoohoo yet, but it's gay approved.

And as a "resident expert," Nerdy is correct. He's a grower, and it's big. Don't ask how I know...I just do. :)

And I /love/ that we went from Transformers to Potter's peter.

Flynn said...

... that's a comic:

"Harry Potter and the Horse Vulva"

His Sinfulness said...

...

I have completely lost control around here...

Nerdygirl said...

Jim, I knew you would come through for us!

Big Gay Jim said...

Well, if there's famous winkie on the internets, I've probably heard about, read about, or seen it. ;) I do know one or two men who are fond of the penis. Well, almost any guy is fond of his own. They're fond of other people's. Allegedly. I've heard.

Mayren said...

OMG i leave work and come home just to find this post broke 40 effing comments based on big alient robots and potter's wang

Fan-Freaking-tastic

OMFG

becca said...

wow, I was going to comment on seeing transformers yesterday. . . but we are WAY past that.

Um. . . I thought the movie was cool.

I got nothin on hp naked. Still looking forward to seeing that movie this weekend (even though now I probably won't ever look at Harry Potter the same way again- thanks guys!)

Flynn said...

... and now I've seen Harry Potter's junk... Thanks for that Jim, now about those photos of Hermione!..

Squid said...

....ummm... WTF guys!!! Ya'll are seriously cracked. I'm gonna go hide in a corner now. And enjoy the Transformers tonight.

Modig_Bjorn said...

That a squid! Don't let these evil-doers corrupt you! We must be strong!

MightyMightyMax said...

Jim - Thanks for the link.

Should I feel bad about liking those pics?

Mandy said...

Oh, hell, Max. No feeling bad about liking the pics. He's yummy...even if young. (I'd say this just got weird...looking at the same porn as my cousin...but it is the Flock!)

I've already passed the link to several people from AZ to Tennessee. Noone will be watching that movie in quite the same way!

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