Sunday Sermon - 4th of July Edition

For long-time readers who have come here looking for my traditional 4th of July rant against nationalism, I'll just direct you to a previous post.

Instead, we are going to examine some of the unique 4th of July festivities going on around the country...

If you are in Memphis, you can check out the unveiling of this thing (I absolutely fucking refuse to call it a statue, as that might imply that it's "art" somehow).

To read about this monstrosity, click here.

If you're in Kenwood, CA, on the 4th you can compete in the World Pillow Fighting Championships.

Rules and more photos can be found here.

Rock Island, IL, is hosting the 20th Annual Great Cardboard Boat Regatta on the 4th.

More photos here.

The lovely town of Eau Claire, MI, is holding the 33rd Annual Cherry Pit Spitting Championship on the 4th as well.

Details here.

I guess we should be thankful that these kind of celebrations have replaced the military parades and artillery salutes that used to be our traditional 4th of July fare (click here for a chronological history of notable 4th of July celebrations through history). I'd rather the world think that we are crazy freaks who have silly contests on the 4th than think that we are crazy freaks with a thirst for military conquest... ok, that was a little too close to home to be funny.

Personally, I'd prefer to take some 'shrooms and watch the fireworks over the stadium. However you decide to celebrate, be safe, and take just a few moments from your beer and brats to think of all the others in the world who aren't as lucky as we, or as well fed, housed, and clothed as we. Then think about why they are in that boat... Then you'll probably want another few beers to deaden that feeling.

Grill in peace.

11 comments:

Modig_Bjorn said...

I am all about the pellow fighting right here! Thanks again for coming to the BBQ! And, for whatever it's worth (likely little) happy Independence Day!

Big Gay Jim said...

Frightening but true: While driving back east to Illinois one year, we heard the radio broadcast of the Cherry Spitting Contest. I think there should be banjo music playing in the background when I confess that.

His Sinfulness said...

"You got a really purty mouth..." *shudder*

born again flocker said...

Word to the last paragraph.

His Sinfulness said...

Born Again Flocker - glad to hear from you! Long time no comment...

Anonymous said...

Now now, dear rev, I think you are reading the holiday wrong. It is a celebration of independence, not an exercise in monolithic, corrupt power schemes nor an way to seperate ourselves from the rest of the world. Patrotism can be many things. Every 4th, it's good to be free enough to express that freedom.

His Sinfulness said...

Dear Anonymous,

If you're new, welcome to the Flock. Please feel free to use any screen name, but I would appreciate it if you didn't stay anonymous for too long - it makes it so hard to keep track of who is pissed at me... ;)

You see, the problem is, independence is a myth. Every nation, every person, is inextricably intertwined with every other. We are not independent in any way - without the other people on this planet, we wouldn't be here. When one acts in a greedy, irresponsible way, all on the panet are lessened, all suffer in some way. No amount of flag waving and roman candles will ever change that.

Patriotism is just another way of creating illusory dividers separating ourselves from the rest of the world. It compartmentalizes the world population and gives us names to hang on them, like "Afghani" or "Iraqi" instead of thinking of them as "people." It's just "Us vs. Them" dressed up and put on parade. I like to think that some day we won't need it, and we can focus on working as a planet.

Don't get me wrong - I like booze and grilling as much as the next guy. I'd just prefer it if our standard of living wasn't predicated on other (mostly brown) people being so poor. If one of us is oppressed, then none of us is truly free.

Modig_Bjorn said...

Can I get an Amen for Linus' last post? Can I get an Amen?!?

Levi said...

i can't remember which one is fat daddy's/ice house... was it the one on 3rd? the other half of the cowboy? i'll be down saturday playing a show of my own, what time are you guys going down?

Levi said...

we're playing a house show, haha, the same house show we've been playing in laramie, but it's cool cause the house is big and they have frozen waffles. mm... waffles. but yea, it's like... 15th and arnold, the corner of, a big yellow house with a red door, we open at 7ish, since i won't be singing iw ill be breaking lots of stuff so you should come on by. do you know what time you start saturday?

born again flocker said...

I was out of town catching some rays and had limited internet access. I wasn't sure where to respond for being tagged, hopefully you got the telepathic response.

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