BBBC Day 3

Topic for today:
"Would you start a relationship with someone you met online? Would you have a problem telling people that's where you met? Do you think it's easier to meet someone online rather than at work or at a club?"

I met my current GF at a poetry slam, so I have no room to criticize anyone's hook-up hunting habits. I do, however, have my doubts about the online thing ever working for me. I once had a long distance friendship that turned into something romantic over the tubes but we knew each other in person well before the chatting began. I am very visual, so a pure internet romance, even with webcams, just wouldn't work for me.

Meeting people at work is not a great idea, unless their job is completely unrelated to yours. If you are in the same office, or in offices that have to cooperate or compete it is a recipe for trouble. I have a hard and fast rule - don't even consider your coworkers as romantic possibilities.

The club scene seems to me the very worst place to meet someone. In a club or bar, it is generally loud, dark, and drunken. Possibly smoky as well. No one is themselves at a club - they are either trying to "bring their A game" or they have had a few drinks. Either way, if you meet someone there, you will just have to meet them again when you are in a more normal setting.

Mate selection is a very complex issue, studied heavily by a number of academic disciplines. In Sociology it's been tackled to some extent by almost every theoretical perspective. In my studies, the evolutionary model was my favorite. In essence, evolutionary theory holds that mate selection is predicated upon the need to select the best available mate for viable offspring (this is an incredibly gross oversimplification - it is a much more nuanced theory than this would suggest). Obviously, we've complicated that quite a bit by introducing all the trappings of civilization to the mix. The "best" mate might be the biggest, strongest male, or he might be the male with the thickest wallet or the most prestige. The environment in which the union is to exist must be considered when determining what is "best."

The other issue is availability. Since we don't generally embrace polyamory, the very best mates tend to be taken off the market quickly, leaving others to sort through what might be considered "lesser" choices. I have heard many women complain that all the good men are either taken or homosexuals. One of my dear friends was single at 35, and she described her search as "looking for a needle in a Gay stack."

Given these constraints, I see anything that can extend the pool of possible mates - even the internet - as a positive thing. Just be certain to ask these basic but crucially important questions:

1) Are you a furry?
2) Do you own/collect leather/latex/rubber/etc?
3) When was the last time you ended up in the emergency room after sex?

(Look, you ask your questions and I'll ask mine, ok? Prudes.)

2 comments:

Sci Fi Heroine said...

You should probably mention that at the poetry slam, one of the reasons you found me attractive was the fact that my carefully crafted poem contained instances of lung-vomiting. Kind of takes the cutesy edge off. Also, I see nothing wrong with those questions.

His Sinfulness said...

It's true - your poem about the blood spattered pages of the work Keats did while he was dying of tuberculosis was epic and intensely nerdy. :)

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