Open Wide

Why must dentists always try to converse with you? He's got both hands in my mouth up to the wrist, digging away at my already bleeding gums and he says, "So, your mom tells me you just got back from Ireland. How was it?" You'd think that after 20 years of private practice he'd at least know to confine himself to yes/no questions.

I came out of there with a clear prognosis - about $3000 dollars worth of dental work to be done in the next 6 months or so. I need two crowns and multiple sessions of a fun little procedure called "deep root scaling." Not bad, considering that Reagan was in office the last time I had a checkup...

After he explained to me what needed to be done, I have decided that the teeth are a poorly designed organ. Back when our lifespans were 30-40 years it was no big deal, but now we need teeth for twice that long, and evolution is just not keeping up. I want bone ridges like lizards - tough, low maintenance, and totally lacking in pesky crevices that need flossing.

Yes - the moral of this post is FLOSS. I can't stress enough how much this deep root scaling thing is going to suck...