Wish List

It has been brought to my attention that I am one for whom it is hard to shop. I have been encouraged by the BCPs to construct the following list as an aid to the Cyber-Faithful. Naturally, I would be pleased with a donation to charity in my name - in fact, I have a post on that very topic planned for later this week - but for those of a more materialist bent, I present in no particular order a few things I'd like to have...

An udu. The udu is played by striking it with all parts of the hand, and by cupping the hand(s) over the hole(s). Different techniques and different locations on the drum yeild many different sounds. I love hand drumming (that is, drumming without sticks), and the udu offers a number of cool sounds, but with less volume than a doumbec, djembe, or congas. I could play this at FlockHall without disturbing all the other inmates...

A nice mate and bombilla for yerba mate. I have a serviceable mate and bombilla, but I would love to have a larger one (I am as big as a house - my caffeine tolerance/jones is quite phenomenal). Other yerba mate paraphernalia (like a cool thermos, so I can stop stealing Ducky's) would be lovely also, as would a bag of the herb itself.

Clubbells. They are an absolutely awesome workout tool. Versatile, sturdy, and even fun to use. There is something meditative about rhythmically swinging these beasts about your head, and they are coated in rubber in case you aren't all that coordinated. I have a pair of 15 pound clubbells - they are central to my workouts, but I have grown strong enough now that a larger clubbell would be a big help. Any club of 25 pounds or more would be useful for single-handed exercises, and disciplining the cat. KIDDING, of course. The cat is way too fast for that...

A push-up board. I know, I know - another workout toy, but this is an item I would use three, maybe four times a week, and think gratefully of the giver each time. If you like the idea of me sweating and grunting while I pump up and down and think of you, then this is the gift choice for you! It would also be perfect if you are just tired of looking at my flabby moobs (man boobs). All kidding aside, this helps reduce wrist pain while doing push-ups and other "forward leaning rest position" exercises. When gripping the ends of the board, your hands are in a more natural position and your wrists don't hurt... which leaves you more able to concentrate on the searing pain elsewhere in your body...

Apple butter. It's not just a joke around here - I really do love apple butter. It contains important trace elements that my body needs in order to keep up with my hectic schedule of evil-doing. The store brands are ok, but they lack the homespun goodness of apple butter that someone canned themselves. I like my apple butter like I like my women - smooth, spicy, and straight - but I am not opposed to the bi varieties (pumpkin-apple, apple-pecan, peach-apple, etc.).

If none of these suit your tastes, you can simply use the three cop-out gifts my family always uses; books, games, and hot sauce.