Holiday Wrap-Up

I have returned from the Northern Stronghold of the Papal Mother (known by mortals as "Oregon") and I have learned a few important things...

1) A 2:00AM blow out of the Popemobile's left front tire about 20 miles west of Evanston, WY made it clear to me that the good people at AAA deserve every penny of my membership dues. The tow truck driver who came out to assist us was awesome and deserves a medal, or at least some kind of hot drink.

2) Giving your sister's 4-year old a drum set for Christmas is just as awesome as it sounds - as long as you get to drop the gift and leave. Having to listen to her arhythmic flailings for the next three days was just poor planning on my part.

3) The gift of the year for the wayward pope on your list was the TomTom GPS - I actually got two of them. One was returned for cash, which I cleverly turned into a new tire (see #1 above).

4) The udu is a great stress reliever, and it has proven to be the perfect background noise for the chatting and gaming that takes place in the Flockhall great room on a nearly daily basis. Now that I have started to understand the various sounds that are possible, I really want to get an internal microphone so I can record my random thumping (not to be confused with arhythmic flailings, see #2 above).

5) Disney's return to old school animation, The Princess and the Frog, was not nearly as bad as I had imagined it would be. If you have access to a young child who can legitimize your presence at the theatre, go see it. The moral of the story appears to be that feckless European princes should not mess with voodoo, and wishing on stars still works. Also, marriage is key to happiness and curse-breaking.

6) The most recent movie version of Sherlock Holmes was much like my experience of reading the books - a resounding "eh." I didn't hate it, but I won't sit through it again, much to the chagrin of certain inmates of Flockhall. I suspect said inmates are simply interested in gawking at the shirtless Robert Downey Jr., and screw them, they can wait for Ironman 2.

7) Lastly, I have found that a month off from just about all responsibilities is not good for the Pontifex Niger. I am, by nature, shiftless and lazy, so giving me license to indulge my base inclinations only leads to sloth. While I feel good about some of my activities over the last four weeks - I have returned to a regular running program, I have practiced my guitar much more, and I have done some reading for pleasure - for the most part it seems that lack of structure turns me into a slovenly oaf. Perhaps it's best that I was swapped at birth with a pauper, saving me from the angst of noblesse oblige - everything happens for a reason, children.